Adoption Language

Sitting in the doc's office the other day, I received questions/comments from others waiting. This is common. Many say "oh how cute! how old is he?" - i really don't like the age questions as Micah is 7 1/2 months old but is quite small. I'll admit I tell strangers is 5-6 months and they still gasp! Sometimes I qualify the statement and say "he was adopted from Ethiopia - we just brought him home". I think now I might just let the strangers believe that I don't feed him enough :) It's easier. Consider this conversation even that I had:

Stranger: How old is he? He's soo cute!?

Me: About 6 months.

Stranger: Wow! He's small.

Me: thinking (golly I hadn't noticed) - "yeah, we adopted him from Ethiopia"

Stranger: "OH, so he's not really yours"

Me: Yes he's ours, we adopted him. He's my son.

I don't think this stranger meant anything rude by her comments - I really don't think she knew what she was saying. She was not educated on adoption language. In other words, she is ignorant of the sensitivity in words needed around adoptive parents, but MOST importantly, their children. I hope Micah never hears a stranger say these words when he is older and can understand what others are saying. How horrible for a child to hear someone say to his mother "oh so he's not really yours"

Micah, you are MY son, you are MINE! You are my "own", "real" and "natural" child. I am your "real" and "natural" parent. I chose you and I would choose you again and again. You will always be my son and will always be a Richardson in our forever family!

So for all you bloggies who read this blog, below is adoption language 101. I encourage you, if you are friends/family of ours, and will be a part of Micah's life, to do a google search of "positive adoption language" if you are unfamiliar with adoption language or catch yourself saying "I might adopt after I have my own children"

Natural Child: Any child who is not artificial.

Real Parent: Any parent who is not imaginary.

Your Own Child: Any child who is not someone else's child.

Adopted Child: A natural child, with a real parent, who is all my own.Rita Laws, PhD

Doc update and other things

I started a post a few days ago but got interrupted by a little man, oh about 13 pounds, 25 inches tall. Yes, he went to the doctor on Wednesday of last week and weighed 13.1 pounds! He's growing for sure - he's definitely eating enough too! On Friday he got his annoying PICC line out. Micah wasn't happy with the procedure to take it out (he proceeded to scream off and on all night long - making sure I knew how he felt about what had happened) but later at bathtime, things were more fun - all arms allowed this time :)

In other news, we started the cloth diapers yesterday and had a hoot with them! He looks so cute! Now I think all the way to wide 3-6 month Old Navy pants/jeans might not just fall right off him :)


And now, more pictures of random cuteness

It takes a village!

Micah is doing very well these days! He has 4 more days of antibiotics left and we are counting them down! Bath time will be much more fun without a saran-wrapped arm held up in the air by Daddy. For now he splashes with three limbs :)

As for giving antibiotics every night, it takes three people for a successful administration and happy baby. I give the medicine which consists of four syringes of fluids (1 salines, antiobiotics, another saline, and heparin). Daddy (Roscoe) holds his cute little arms down ever so gently (the boy hates to be restrained). Grandma Linda provides the most important part - and that is keeping Micah entertained and happy for the roughly 5 minutes it takes to complete the task. So far, only one meltdown and that was last night - the poor guy was just too tired to be held down and since he likes to sleep on his side, he kept wanting to roll over. Daddy wouldn't let him and boy did that make him angry! But overall, he does very well with the whole thing! We're grateful he's still a biddy. I can't imagine trying to do this with a toddler. Whew!

More pics - Maybe I'll write something soon :)

Micah and Daddy doing taxes!


swinging..weeee


sleepy time

Pictures!

We don't know what to do with rice yet :)


Now we're all smiles!

We're home!

Hi all - Thanks for praying! Micah came home last night and has been fever free for a few days. There is no bacteria growing in his blood/spinal fluid now but we are giving him 21 days of IV antiobiotics through a port that was placed in the hospital to finish the job of "bacteria killing" :) Otherwise, Micah has no other issues, including no parasites, viruses, metabolic disorders, infectious diseases from Africa etc. He is just underweight and needs to catch up as far as motor and developmental skills.

Micah's final diagnosis was Salmonella Shigellosis (Shigella) in GI tract, blood and spinal fluid.

When we left Africa, Micah weighed 12.3 pounds. He was 11.3 when we arrived at the hospital 24 hours later. In the hospital he gained weight to 12.0 pounds. He's 26 inches long and continues to eat very well.

we're excited to begin our lives here at home! Pictures to follow shortly!

Wednesday update

Nothing big that is new today. Tomorrow morning Micah will have a PICC line placed (an IV to last all month) - so I can administer antibiotics to him for the next 21 days. Please pray for him tonight as he has to go 8 hours without food and absolutely hates that. Mommmy doesn't like it either. Otherwise, we hope to go home soon!

Thanks for your prayers - he is doing so much better! We are amazed at God's love for us and provision through this entire ordeal!

Tuesday update

Well today there is a bit more news. The same infection (a strain of salmonella which is likely typhoid) that is in his blood is also in his cerebral spinal fluid. Think Bacterial meningitis... He had a spinal tap yesterday to confirm this. we will treat him wiht IV antibiotics for 21 days. He will have a PICC line in his arm and I will administer IV antibiotics to him daily.

No news yet as far as if there are other causes for his severe diarrhea. All the bacteria is uncommon or not found in US. There are no viruses at least in his GI. AND no giardia. SO we await to see if there are any parasites. This can take two to three tests since the parasites may not lay eggs everyday.

He's doing well overall - he's eating well on Alimentum (a hypoallergenic formula). He's babbling to us and singing. OT and PT were in today and say his gross motor skills are at 3 months and fine motor skills at 4 months. We have some catch up to do but that is to be expected.

We love him so much and he is such a blessing to our lives! We continue to be amazed at how resilient he is!

Thanks for your prayers. We hope to be home this weekend (noone said this but I've got s gut feeling- haha)

Almost home

We made it home to America...but our not at our house yet.

We will update about our trip in the coming weeks. For now we post about the present.

Micah was sick with common ailments from an orphanage when we picked him up on Tues March 31. He worsened through the week and long story short, we had to take him directly to the ER from the airport in Columbus. It was a rough Saturday night here at the hospital as Micah was very lethargic and listless. Roscoe and I were slurring our speech as we were also exhausted from not sleeping in 48 hours. Our parents rescued us and held Micah all night as vitals/blood was taken frequently.

Sunday he perked up a bit but had to remain on bowel rest (meaning he could not eat food, just pedialyte - small amounts) - it was terrible to see my son wailing for food and to not be able to meet his most basic need. Although I knew it was for his health, it was still very hard. He was able to eat later that night and now has some anxiety when we take his bottle away. He is getting better about it though.

Today we learned he may have typhoid fever (which is a strain of salmonella bacteria) in his blood, and has E.Coli and Klebsiella bacteria in his urinary tract. There are more tests pending. He is responding well now to antibiotics and is so much more alert and active. We are so in love with him! He is such a trooper!

There were so many answered prayers and signs that God was working on our behalf on our trip and ride home.

Thank you for your continued prayers! We will keep you updated.